The good that I can do

My husband told me my last post sounded a bit like a rant.  I had him read some posts where women shared their honest feelings about the frustrating things in their lives.  He finally said "It seems like there are a lot of women who are sick of the amount of pressure they are under." 

The truth is that we all feel this way sometimes.  Some of us blog about it, some of us don't.  But whether we read blogs to stay connected (my social life is pretty much online right now because I need to be at home with my children), or do lunch or girl's night out, it really helps to have women there to support you and build you up. 

I am feeling much better.  Thank you for all the prayers and kindness.  I wasn't planning on blogging about the situation with my mother, but I had a really hard week dealing with all the feelings this situation brought up.  I have spent the last few years trying to help heal family situations on both sides of the family.  I have even argued with Trent about it several times in the past.  He said I should let go of the difficult family relationships.  I said that if I tried hard enough, I could have an impact and maybe change some things.

Well, after a few years of effort, I was rejected by more than one person.  One family member flat out told me that she was sorry that the relationship meant more to me than it ever did to her.  So, I have been feeling disillusioned and sad. 

What should a girl do when forced to face an ugly reality?  This girl is going to focus on creating a beautiful life.  I need to stop wasting energy trying to fix situations that I can't control.  I need to put my energy into creating a happy (and beautiful) home.  I need to help people who want my help.

My good friend Sheri's sister Jailyn just had baby Garak.  She sent me a link to the blog she created telling his story.  Baby Garak is brand new to this world and has already had to face intense suffering.  There is a link for donating.  Even a little bit of money adds up when a lot of people donate. (Warning: this blog might cause tears.)

So, right after I donate to this sweet family, I am going to start creating things for all the special people in my life for Christmas.  I also get to watch my friend's twin toddler girls tomorrow (and make dessert for their cute family :)  There are so many small ways to make the world a brighter place.  And it feels a lot better than sitting around feeling sorry for myself!